pondering on a mistake

guess what... i'm completely broke... haha and it sucks. i literally have around 200 dollars in my bank account and that is it. this is seriously way stressful to me! it just makes me think again that i really shouldn't have come to school this semester. so far, i have no motivation to be in school. i am having an alright time but not as much fun as i would like to be having. and in all honesty, i should have just listened to the few people that told me to go with what my heart was telling me to do. i didn't want to go to school because i really felt like it wasn't the right place for me to be and i still feel that way. nothing has changed. if i would have moved to st george instead of going to school, i could have bought a decent car, had my apartment and would be able to work in order to actually have money. i don't even know how i can afford to do anything next semester. actually i know for a fact that i can't. i am so broke. i feel like my only option is to stay at home and live and work there which i just don't feel like i can handle. i really feel like i need to go somewhere and just be able to experience the life i want to. i know that is what college is supposed to be like, but i never can feel like it really is. i know that the only reason i'm at this school is because it is what everyone does and because it was cheap. since when did i do what everyone else does? it's not really my thing. and i really do have such a hard time with some people here. i know it is a great school i just sometimes don't feel like it's a great school for me personally. anyways i really am starting to regret letting the decision get made for me that i needed to go to school. i should have stood my ground and done what i wanted. i would have been so much better off in so many ways. i honestly have no idea how anything is going to work out now and it is so stressful but theres nothing i can do but wait it out and let the punches roll. i know one thing for sure, it's not going to end well.